Tag Archives: freemasonry

Being a Masonic Leader

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Between two leadership conferences, September was definetly leadership month. Although September has passed us, I want to share with you some of the things that I learned during the month. If you think that this doesn’t pertain to you, or you think the whole concept is kind of lame, and too full of jargon, I want to challenge you to read on before just moving on to a different website. That’s because not only does everyone have the potiental to be a leader, but in one way or another, everyone is one, whether you realize it or not. Being a leader simply involves guiding, directing, or influencing others. That’s it, pretty simple. Leading can not only mean acting as WM of your Lodge, but it can also be encouraging your kids to make good choices. Naturally, this can have a positive or negative connotation, while “leadership” is usually seen positively, “ringleader” is not so much. Usually, this is something that most people do naturally, in one way or another, whether you realize it or not.

 The Nebraska Triennual Masonic Youth Leadership Conference

I spoke at length about what everyone got to do at MYLC this year. If you missed that, you can check it out here. The keynote speaker, Josh Shipp, was beyond awesome. He had a ton of amazing things to say, and I’m afraid the meager notes I took will not allow me to do him justice. He made two points that really stuck with me, that I want to go over briefly.

 Don’t be average. When it comes to things like leadership, this seems fairly self explainatory. However, it can also be the most difficult to actually accomplish. When we deviate from average, either above, or below, people tend to take notice. As I’ve said before, your leadership can be both a positive and a negative thing. If you’re at work and you go above and beyond whats needed, and you encourage others to do so, that’s awesome. The opposite, not so much. Being outside the norm almost always puts you in a position for potential leadership. The more you strive to be above (or below) average, the more likely people around you will notice, and if they like what they see, are likely to follow you. Don’t be afraid to be different or weird, that is an advantage you can use when it comes to influencing others.

Don’t be afraid to be human. Actually, the exact quote from Josh is, “Your imperfections make you human. Your humanity makes you influential.” If you have car trouble and are late to a meeting, or you fumble the powerpoint, you don’t need to draw attention to it. These actions can actually cause people to be more likely to follow your lead, because it makes them realize that you aren’t a person who is in a completely unobtainable position, you are someone who is just like them.

As I said in my MYLC post, if you ever get a chance to hear Josh Shipp talk, do it. The guy is amazing. You can find out more, including free videos at www.joshshipp.com

The Grand Lodge of Nebraska’s First Annual Leadership Conference

During the GL Leadership conference, a man named Hal came and spoke with us about simple things that we can do everyday to become leaders. He told us that he keeps this list in his bedside table, and looks at it every night. All of these pertain to Masonry, but more than that, many of them can also be accomplished at work, or at home.

1. Always prepare for a meeting, whether or not you are leading the meeting.

2. Demonstrate that you listened, and heard what was said. Usually through taking notes and asking questions.

3. Share leadership opportunities with those around you. Let someone else take the stage.

4. Say thank you for those who helped you along the way.

5.Give credit to others for their contribution to your success. If you’re walking along and you see a turtle up on a fencepost, you know that he didn’t get there on his own.

6. Don’t be in a hurry.

7. Two can accomplish more than one.

8. To be appreciated as a helper, set the example.

9. Be a good citizen.

10. Give thanks spiritually.

All seems pretty basic right? That seems to be the trick that the majority of leadership conferences seem to skip over. It really is that simple. If you have ever read, or seen the play All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, by Robert Fulgrum, you may remember the Kindergarten Creed. If not, it’s below. Check out the similarities between the creed and what Hal had to say.

Share everything.

Play fair.

Don’t hit people.

Put things back where you found them.

Clean up your own mess.

Don’t take things that aren’t yours.

Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.

Wash your hands before you eat.

Flush.

Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.

Live a balanced life –learn some and drink some and draw some and paint some and sing and dance and play and work everyday some.

Take a nap every afternoon.

When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.

Be aware of wonder.

Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup- the roots go down and the plant goes up, and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.

Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup, they all die. So do we.

And remember the Dick and Jane books, and the first word you learned, the biggest word of all, LOOK.

Being a leader is really about doing all those things that you already do, and some of the things you don’t do, but you know that you should. It doesn’t seem like it really should be that simple, but it really is.

What Actually Happens at Lodge

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So, you’ve been with your Mason for a while now, you know he goes off to Lodge every week or two weeks, and you know he comes back late, you’ve maybe even been to a few of the dinners that they put on before the meeting. But what do they actually do at these meetings? What’s so important that it has to go on behind closed doors?  The answer might surprise you.

The Masonic Meal

Arguable one of the most important aspects of the Lodge meeting is the meal beforehand. Not every Lodge has them, but many of them do, some before, and some after the meeting. Usually potluck, although some Lodge’s have been known to cater dinners, the meal before the Lodge meeting tends to be the best opportunity for fellowship, not only between the members of the Lodge, but also between their families. I have never known a Lodge meal to not be open to families and friends, but some Lodges may have private policies. If it is open to the “public” (i.e. non-Masons), I highly recommend that you go. Not only is it a great homemade meal (it’s usually potluck, so ask of you should bring something!), but it also gives you a chance to get to meet all of the men that he spends time with every week. I know that it helped put my mind at ease to actually be able to put names to faces. Going to these dinners will also allow you to be more involved in the Lodge. At T’s Lodge, the women clean up after the meal (although, this is apparently not the norm elsewhere), and then we sit, chat, have coffee or play cards. It really helps facilitate the family feel of Masonry. We have family style dinners like this once a month, and I always look forward to it. Give it a shot at least once.

Opening of the Lodge

There are three main types of Lodge meetings. business meetings, where normal business is conducted; degree work, where a Mason receives a degree, this involves the majority of the secret ritual work; and other meetings, these may include papers or other presentations, or other special topics. How often each meeting occurs depends on the Lodge. Lodges meet anywhere from one to four times a month, plus any special committee meetings. Which of these meetings occurs when depends on the needs of the Lodge, some will only have business meetings with the occasional degree work, others may focus on the “fun” types of meetings. T’s Lodge (which currently has a waiting list!) only has time for degree work each week. However, every Lodge will have at least one business meeting each month.

Every meeting, regardless of what they may be doing, open and closes almost the same way each time (different degrees may be opened different ways, but always more or less the same thing). Please note that exactly what is said and done varies from jurisdiction to jurisdiction, however, many things stay the same throughout the country; therefore, I will be making this as general as possible. Before the opening of the meeting, all non-officer members sit where they please alongside the “north” and “south” parts of the Lodge room. (Some Lodges are not set up so that the Worshipful Master is sitting actually in the east, however, it is still referred to as the East.)  The officers come in, sometimes to music, and each of the officers take their respective positions (You can read more about that here.)  The Tyler is then put with the task of  securing the meeting from intruders, and an officer is asked to make sure that all present are Masons or candidates. There is then a ritual where each officer is called upon by the WM, and asked to relay the duties. and sometimes signs or other meanings of their office. This helps to remind each member why they are there, and also helps new members recall which station is which. A prayer is then given by the Chaplain, and the Pledge of Allegiance may be done. The Lodge is then open.

Order of Business

Business is then conducted. Even though you may think that it would, Masonic Lodges do not follow Robert’s Rules of Order. Instead, each Grand Lodge jurisdiction will lay out the order of each business meeting. Usually, it ends up something like this:

  • Reading and confirming of minutes– Just like you may in any other meeting, the minutes are supposed to be read, but they may be printed off, or displayed on a screen instead. They are then voted on, and if approved, archived.
  • Introduction of visitors – This is usually done by the WM, and may be skipped if the person is a frequent visitor.
  • Reading of petitions – The reading of petitions from potential new members. After a petition is read, the interview committee is formed.
  • Balloting on petitions– The interview committee will come back and give report on the candidate that they interviewed. A vote will then occur of the person is to receive the degrees of Masonry.
  • Reports of committees – Some jurisdictions may require this to be in writing, some may not. Committees are usually degree work, finances, fellowship committee, etc.
  • Applications for relief-  As I have stated before, a Mason is eligible to petition his Lodge to help him financially. Depending on the amount and situation, it may be voted on immediately. Often, Lodges will also include a list of members hospitalized, as well as recent deaths.
  • Reading of communications- Lodges get a lot of mail, usually from other Lodges, or other Masonic organizations. These are usually read to inform the members as to what else is going on Masonically in the area. The Grand Lodge may send out communications so often, and it is required that every Lodge read this communication during their business meeting. Bills, usually for the Lodge building, are also read and voted on during this time.
  • Unfinished business Exactly as it sounds, this is the time that any business that may have carried over from the last meeting is discussed.
  • New business Again, pretty simple here, any new business that the Lodge needs to take care of is discussed at this time.
  • Business for the good of the order- This is kind of open floor time, and gives members of the Lodge a chance to speak up about anything going on that they might want others to know about (usually things like fundraisers, school events, Girl Scout cookies, etc)
  • Ritual work and lectures – This is where the meetings can deviate. If the Lodge is conducting degree work, now is when they bring in the candidate. If someone is to give a lecture or other presentation, now is the time. Please remember that this portion may happen at different times during the meeting in different jurisdictions. If it is just a business meeting, nothing happens here.

Closing of the Lodge

When all business has been conducted to the satisfaction of the WM, the Lodge begins its closing ritual. It is usually much shorter than opening. The WM lets the Tyler know they are getting ready to close, the Chapalin gives another prayer, and the WM declares the Lodge closed. That’s it. Remember when I said you may be surprised about what goes on? You may be surprised how mundane, and occasionally boring it can be. However, Masonry is not only what happens in the Lodge room, but also outside it.

An Introduction to Non-Masculine Masonry, Part II

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As mentioned last week, the topic of non-masculine Freemasonry tends to illicit a strong response from most people involved in Masonry, no matter which side of the fence they may fall on as far as the actual subject is concerned. This week I wanted to look some of the terms used when talking about non-masculine Lodges, some of the arguments against the organizations, and some history behind the separation between masculine and non-masculine Masonry . If you missed out on the introduction last week, you can check it out here.

Regular versus Irregular versus Clandestine

Perhaps one of the most confusing parts of the argument either for or against non-masculine Masonry, are the terms used to describe it. Often you will hear masculine Masons refer to non-masculine Masonry as irregular, clandestine, or unrecognized.  However, contrary to popular belief, these words do not all mean the same thing. Wording is everything with Masons (thanks Taozen!), no matter which flavor of Masonry they may ascribe to. In the definitions below, please keep in mind that these are from the masculine Mason point of view, a member of a non-masculine Masonic Lodge may have  different definitions.

  • Regular – Ironically, this is probably the most difficult definition. That’s because what qualifies a Lodge as regular can differ from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. Regular simply means that the Lodge meets the standards that have been established by the Grand Lodge that it wants to be a part of. This works on the Grand Lodge level as well, where a Grand Lodge is considered regular if it meets the standards established by the second Grand Lodge that is inquiring the regularity. This doesn’t mean that they have to meet the standards exactly, more that any differences between the two would be trivial. The standards usually include things like ceremonies, hierarchy, and general philosophy.
  • Recognized – After two Lodges or Grand Lodges have deemed each other to be regular, a formal agreement is made, usually with a lot of paperwork, that states that the two Lodges or Grand Lodges agree that the other is regular. We now say that they recognize each other, and members of both Lodges or Grand Lodges may recognize each other as brothers, this usually includes visitation rights.
  • Irregular– A Lodge or Grand Lodge is considered irregular by the inquiring Lodge or Grand Lodge if they do not meet the standards, or if the differences between the standards would be too great. So let’s say  Lodge #826 wants to put on a panel at the statewide Masonic conference, but #826 isn’t a member of the Grand Lodge of Alabama, where the Lodges resides. So, the Grand Lodge of Alabama looks into the standards of what makes up Lodge #826, the core of the Lodge. If the Grand Lodge of Alabama feels that the heart of Lodge #826 is too different from the standards set up by the Grand Lodge of Alabama, then Lodge #826 is considered irregular by the Grand Lodge of Alabama, and therefore not allowed to take part in the statewide conference as a Lodge. (Same scenario works with regular, with Lodge #826 being able to attend.)
  • Unrecognized – Much like you might guess, if two Lodges or Grand Lodges feel that the difference between their standards is too great, and that the other is irregular, they now consider the other Lodge unrecognized as well. Again, even though it sounds negative, it really is not, it simply means that their standards of Masonry, what they consider to be the most important things to uphold, did not match up.
  • Clandestine– Clandestine is usually the term used to describe Lodges that allow women and atheists. However, if someone uses this word to describe these Lodges they are (usually) incorrect. A Lodge is considered clandestine if it was established with ill or dishonorable intent. These are known as the “scam” lodges, and usually involve you paying a large sum of money for little to no degree work, and a certificate with a fancy title on it. Regardless of how you may feel about non-masculine Masonry, I think we can all agree that this is not Masonry, and is often little more than a pyramid scheme.

The argument against non-masculine Masonry

So, what does this mean for non-masculine Masons? Well, the United Grand Lodge of England (UGLE), acknowledges that they are Masons, but does not consider them regular nor recognize them. Kind of a “I see you over there, but I’m pretending you don’t exist” kind of thing. While there are a number of Grand Lodges in the EU that do recognize them, the issue in the States is a bit more complicated. The Grand Lodges in the United States that are masculine, are (most) all recognized by UGLE. That means that the differences between a non-masculine Lodge in the US and a masculine one would be too great for the two Lodges to recognize each other. As a result, non-masculine Masonry tends to not be very popular in the States, since most of the overseeing organizations are based overseas. In fact, many Masons in the United States are unaware of the existence of non-masculine Masonry, or are ill-informed on the topic.

Of course, tends to lead to some very heated arguments. Without going into too much detail, some of these arguments against non-masculine Masonry include that the authenticity of Freemasonry is lost when we ignore the rules and allow women, that it goes against the obligation taken during the degree work, and of course, that’s the way that it’s always been.Funny thing is, they are often talking about two (or more) different organizations with the same, or similar names, and varying history, in some cases dating back before the foundation of masculine Masonry.  I have found that many Masons tend to be very defensive about “their” craft. However, contrary to conspiracy theorists beliefs, Masonry was not passed down from the gods (or demons for that matter), no one person or organization owns Freemasonry, in fact, the square and compass emblem is not even trademarked, and never will be.

I think of it a bit like the difference between the Girl Scouts and the Girl Guides. Both have very similar names, and very similar goals. In fact, some of their ceremonial work is even the same, which makes sense, since they both really came from the same place. The two don’t interact on a group level, and really both just kind of do their own thing. Eventually, one became more popular than another in one country, while the opposite happened in other countries. It doesn’t make either organization less real, or one more right than the other, they are simply two different groups working toward a very similar end result.

Why did all of this happen?

There are many different reasons as to why the rift between masculine and non-masculine Masonry occurred, and why it is still perpetuated today. Most interestingly I think however, is that we know when it started. In the beginning, everyone recognized each other, and everything was all hunky-dory. However, shortly after the American Civil War,  the first case of derecognition (that is, no longer recognizing a group you once recognized) occurred. In 1869, the Grand Orient de France (GODF) recognized a Lodge in Louisiana that the Grand Lodge of Louisiana did not. The Grand Lodge of Louisiana felt that this was an invasion of their jurisdiction, and decided to remove their recognition of GODF. The Grand Lodge of Louisiana convinced many other US Grand Lodges to remove their recognition as well.

This schism grew soon after when the GODF decided to remove the belief in a higher power as a requirement for joining in 1877.  Once UGLE got wind that GODF was allowing atheists to become members, they decided to formally remove their recognition, and declared GODF irregular.  Since the majority of jurisdictions follow the lead of either GODF or UGLE, the number of Lodges deemed irregular by UGLE grew. GODF  decided to officially allow the initiation of women in 2010, causing further discord among the two major bodies of Freemasonry.

Who knows what the future of Freemasonry may hold. I would like to see the two warring groups come together as opposed to drift further apart; unfortunetly, I am not sure that this is the course that we are currently on. I think that perhaps one of the most important things to remember when it comes to this topic, is simply to respect one another. Just because you do not agree with something that someone does means that it is wrong, or not real. No matter which route you may choose, remember to keep your chin up, there’s a lot of hate out there.

I think that’s all on this topic for a bit. I hope this causes much discussion in your Lodges and households. As always, have a great week!

The Masonic Post

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I’m feeling a little under the weather today (boo!), so this article will be short and sweet. I came across these Masonic post cards not too long ago, and was really surprised, not only by how much they pertain to the topic of this blog, but also how prevalent they seem to be. There are many different styles out there, I will try to give you a taste of each.  The two themes that are common, are the phrase “on the square”, usually refers to someone being honest, and may also refer to the keeping of secrets; the other is the funky trapezoid thing with the letters “HTWSSTKS”, this is the emblem of Mark Master Masons, now a part of York Rite. Most of these are from around the early 1900’s. While the true meaning may be lost as far as many are concerned, they tend to paint a very different picture of Masonry than what most people think of when they hear the word today. Perhaps not so much has changed in the last 114 years…

“I always liked a Mason, For a Mason will not tell–The secrets you confide to him, No price can make him sell. No matter what or where or how, He’s always on “the square”. I certainly do like a Mason, for he’s fine as he is fair.”

I kind of can’t help myself but love these.

A more traditional romantic one. Would make for an awesome valentine’s day card!

Plays to the inside joke of “riding the goat”.

Another traditional romantic one.

I like this one in particular, because I think it speaks volumes, without really saying much at all.

Apparently women in the 1900’s were really worried about their beau giving away all their secrets.

Not often seen, a Shriner postcard.

Seriously, what are these women hiding?

This one is a bit rare, because the art style is so different and complex, especially for that time. (This one is from 1911)

I’m kind of starting to wonder what the big secrets were for women in the 20th century. Either it was completely mundane, or absolutely off the wall.

Of course, it wouldn’t be complete without us poking fun at ourselves.

I know that wasn’t what you usually see here, but thanks for checking it out all the same!

If anyone reading is a Co-Mason, and is willing to be interviewed, please contact me here, or shoot me an email at themasonslady@gmail.com

On that note- Have a great week!

The Master’s Ball

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I hope that everyone’s weekend was as awesome as my own! On Saturday, T and I hosted a Master Mason’s Ball downtown at our Scottish Rite Center. From what I can gather, many balls and other formal dances have fallen out of favor, not only within the Masonic community, but also general society. I would encourage you to talk to your Worshipful Master about your Lodge having one, or encourage your Mason to host one during his time in the East.

From what I can find, there is no history of the Master’s Ball; I am not even sure that they happen in other jurisdictions. That being said, I can tell you a bit about it. The concept is very simple: everyone in the Lodge gets dressed up, and gets together to have a good time, and to honor the current and past Worshipful Masters of the Lodge, as well as any other dignitaries that may show up. It is a public event, so non-Masons are welcome as well. It’s more or less an excuse to get really dressed up, and have a great time. So, while I cannot tell you the universal way that Masons do the Master’s Ball (if Masons did anything universally I would be surprised), but I can tell you what we did for ours, and hope to inspire you to have your own.

Some brothers dancing the night away.

Some brothers dancing the night away.

Attire and Venue

Masons love to get dressed up, and I can see why. How many opportunities do you really get to do it in a year? I mean floor length dress or tuxedo, getting your hair done, etc. Maybe one or two for most people, and those are usually weddings. T decided early on that he wanted the attire to be semi-formal to formal. He wanted his attending officers to be in tuxes, and at least a jacket and tie for everyone else. I believe jacket and tie was the attire put on the flyer, and his officers were told privately to wear their tuxes. What we got was people wearing everything from jeans (a DeMolay who came last minute) to floor length ball gowns (myself) and everything in between. It would have made for a very awkward looking group photo. If you’re going to an event, and not sure if your attire is appropriate, ask someone who is putting on the event, or err on the side of overdressing.

The DeMolay who wore jeans...and then made me promise to post this picture.

The DeMolay who wore jeans…and then made me promise to post this picture.

Luckily for us, we live in a large metropolitan area, and have a beautiful Scottish Rite center down town. The entire venue is gorgeous- marble staircases, hardwood floors, they were even repainting a ceiling in a small sitting room with gold leaf! The ballroom we held the event in was no exception. The small amount of information gathering I was able to do lead me to the conclusion that Master’s Balls simply are not done anymore; which in my mind, is more reason to have one. This really gives you a lot of leeway as far as things like venue are concerned, because no one has any preconceived notion of what the ball has to be. While I would not recommend using your lodge, as it might not feel quite “special” enough, and may also not be big enough; your local Shrine center may have the perfect spot for your dance.

The Setup

Although our Master’s Ball was only two days ago, we had begun preparing for it as soon as T became Worshipful Master. He knew it was something that he wanted to do, especially because his Lodge had not hosted one for six or seven years. Our Grand Lodge is very early; most are in the summer, while ours is in early February. We knew that we wanted to have tickets printed to sell by that time, and they were just barely done. As we all know, a good deal of drinking tends to go on at Grand Lodge after the business is all taken care of, and we used this to our advantage to sell more tickets. In addition to this, our large Masonic family in Omaha has a universal calendar sent out every month, and we were sure to add the ball as soon as we had a date set.

Action shot of our beautiful venue.

Action shot of our beautiful venue.

Although we booked the venue well in advance, and let them in on the plan, there was not much to do up until about two months before the event. Around June, T started reminding brothers that the Ball was coming up, how much tickets were, who to talk to, that kind of stuff. I created a poster that hung at the Shrine and other Masonic centers in the area. Some of the other lodge members and their wives took care of contacting the caterer (who was also a brother), those that would be setting up the tables and bar (a brother), taking care of appetizers, and other related items; while T got ahold of the DJ (you guessed it, a brother). When we got there the day of, all we really had to do was place the centerpieces, help the DJ get situated, set up the appetizers, and get ready ourselves.

Itinerary

The evening started, as many Masonic evenings do, at the bar. We opened the doors for cocktail hour (and a half) at 6pm.  T and I had decided to invite many of our non-Masonic friends, and my family had come in from out of town as well. It was wonderful to see everyone socializing and getting along so well. As I said previously, we had a large range of attire, but really, the point of the evening was to be with our friends and family, and have a good time, so we were not about to turn anyone away (save for the confused man who showed up without his pants).

Folk enjoying the food!

Folks enjoying the food!

We had a nice dinner, catered by a brother, as I said previously. T had decided early on that it was simply better to just not give anyone a choice as far as the protein was concerned, and so, everyone had chicken and salmon. This did lead to some confusion, since it’s not normally done that way, so many people who called to buy their tickets still told us which one they wanted. Oh well.

After dinner, T took the time to thank everyone for coming, thank the families from the lodge who had put work into setting up the ball, and  recognizing those who were Past Masters, not only of his Lodge, but also those who had come in from other area Lodges. We were lucky enough to have a few Grand Lodge officers there, including the Deputy Grand Master for our state (aka, the guy who is going to be Grand Master next year).

When that was all said and done, T did something I was not really expecting. He proposed. It was perfect really; I was in a floor length ball gown with his grandmother’s pearls, I had spent the money to get my hair and makeup done, every detail had been meticulously planned;  all of our friends and both of our families were there. Not only did I look like  a princess, but he made me feel like one too (and you always have!). So, guys, take note. 🙂

Our special visitor, to help us celebrate.

The rest of the evening, the whole evening, was very relaxed. Although all of us were in our formal attire, most everyone there knew each other, and so really it was just a fancy party with all of our friends. The ball continued late into the night, with about as much drinking and dancing as you might expect; a lot and, not quite as much.

If anyone’s Lodge hosts a Master’s Ball or something similar, I would love to hear about it. If yours does not, encourage your Mason or Worshipful Master to bring it up at a business meeting. While it is not profitable, and indeed, we operated ours at a loss, sometimes you just need to put on your fanciest outfit and have a nice dinner with your friends; it’s all about having fun!

Ladies at the Table

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Ever have one of those days where everything falls perfectly into place, where nothing deviates from the plan, and everything works out just wonderfully? Saturday was not that day. T and I were set to host Ladies at the Table at the lodge, and numerous things went wrong, including my truck breaking down, the smoker not cooking the brisket not once, but twice, and I think I caught the stove on fire at one point. Luckily, T’s quick thinking resulted in us only being 30 minutes behind schedule, and we were able to have a wonderful dinner and table lodge with our friends and family.

Ladies where?

Ladies at the Table is a very different kind of Masonic event. It is not a degree, a ritual, or ceremony, but it does fall under the jurisdiction of your Grand Lodge, and is usually held at Grand Lodge Communications. The idea is that this is the time for a lodge to show their respect and honor toward a Mason’s lady, widow, mother, daughter, sweetheart, sister…I think you get the picture.  Since, more often than not, the Mason will leave his lady home while he eats at the lodge, this is an opportunity for her to come and feel not only welcomed, but supported and honored in her role as a Mason’s lady. It also gives the ladies of the lodge a chance to not only meet the men that her Mason has been hanging out with, but also the other ladies at the lodge, and perhaps spark her interest in joining the Masonic community.

I will get to how the whole business runs, and it really is quite fun, in a moment. First, I want to go over where the idea came from in the first place. During the 18th century, another type of Masonry was being practiced in France, called French Rite, which was established to parallel Masonry. These “Adoptive Lodges”, were women only, and were called such because a regular Masonic lodge “adopted” them. These lodges had four degrees, Apprentice (or Female Apprentice); Compagnone (or Craftswoman); Maitresse (or Mistress); and Parfaite Maconne (or Perfect Mason.) The fourth degree ended with a Table Lodge, or ceremonial banquet. There is a large possibility that young Englishmen, that were en route to be trained as British military officers attended the final degree, or at least the dinner that followed, and brought it back to regular Masonry .The table lodge is still practiced today in many regular jurisdictions, you may have attended one on Saint John’s Day, or around the winter holidays. Please note- Ladies at the Table is not Adoptive Masonry. It is simply a  borrowed ceremony that is used by a regular Lodge of Masons to show respect and honor to the Ladies of their Lodge.

The “U” shape. Not ours, I did not think that far ahead!

How is this different from a regular Lodge or Chapter meeting?

If you’ve never been to a table lodge, or Ladies at the Table before, you will find that it is quite unlike anything else you have experienced within Masonry before. As I said above, it is not a Masonic ritual, in fact, T and I decided to make ours a very casual, relaxed event. This does not mean, however, that it is not without it’s own set of governing rules. While these vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction, as well as Lodge to Lodge, I will give you a general idea:

  • Traditionally there are 5 courses and 7 toasts to the meal. Our Lodge decided to be much more informal, and relaxed, and therefore had 3 courses, and probably 10 toasts. Some will say that this does not make it a true “table lodge”, but I think that a lot of things like this you need to adapt to fit your own needs and desires.
  • The tables are set in a U shape, with the altar, holding the Bible or other holy book, in the center. T had been in charge of choosing the ritual and letting me know what we needed, and after all of the stress of the day, we realized we had missed this part. Life goes on.
  • Wine is the only alcohol served. You may see a lot of rules about how much wine everyone should be poured, or even what alcohol percentage the wine should be. Unless your Grand Lodge has specific rules for this, do what suits your needs.
  • The ladies should not be the ones cooking, or serving this meal. The idea is to show how much you appreciate them by doing what they normally might on any other lodge night.
T demonstrating the meaning of the word

T demonstrating the meaning of the word “Fire.”

How does the whole thing work, though?

The table lodge is opened similarly as regular lodge might, albeit a much abridged version, with only a few speaking parts, all suitable for the public of course. Usually the opening ceremonies include a short history of the table lodge, or of  Ladies at the Table itself, as well as a history of the lodge that it is taking place in.The Chaplin gives a prayer to open. All of the work is conducted by the Worshipful Master, of course, who sits in the middle table of the “U” with his lady. After opening the Ladies at the Table, dinner is served. When everyone has had their fill, the real fun begins.

In addition to their water cups, everyone has a large shot glass at their seat. This is a special type of shot glass that is a bit thicker on the bottom, and with good reason. It is referred to as a “cannon”, and looks like this. After dinner is over, but before the toasts begin, someone, either the Worshipful Master or the Steward, instructs those attending how the toasts will be done. It goes something like this:

WM: “Brother Senior Steward, charge and align the Cannons of the column of the North. Brother Junior Steward, charge and align the Cannons of the column of the South.” The Stewards fill everyone’s cannons with wine.

WM: “Brothers Senior and Junior Steward, are you cannons charged?” They answer affirmatively.

The WM recognizes the person giving the toast, all rise, and the toast is given.

WM: “With me…” Everyone repeats the last line of the toast, for instance, “to the United States of America,” raising their cannons normally.

WM: “Ready.” Everyone  brings their cannons closer to their body.

WM: “Aim.” Cannon is brought to the lips.

WM: “Fire!” The shot of wine is downed.

WM:”Order.” The cannon is brought to just above the table.

WM: “Arms.” Everyone slams their cannon down on the table, hopefully at the same time, resulting in a terrific noise. (Usually it tends to get better with time, and then worse again.)

Traditionally, there are seven toasts made, as I stated above. At a Ladies at the Table, they are as follows:

  • To the first lady of the United States
  • To the wife of the Grand Master
  • To 3 different women of the Lodge
  • To our mothers
  • To our ladies

We chose to do things a bit differently, and added many of our own toasts, including:

  • To our service men and women
  • To the United States of America
  • To our Grand Lodge
  • To the Craft
  • T also added a special poem he had found about the ladies for the final toast. You can see that here.
The cannons being charged.

The cannons being charged.

So, the point is….?

If you are thinking to yourself that there must be something more to this than having a nice dinner, shooting wine, and being with the ladies of the lodge, then you would be pondering what else there is for some time. The whole point is to relax, have a nice time, and be with friends and family.

If any of you are interested in hosting your own Ladies at the Table, let me know! I would love to hear stories of the way that other Lodges decide to put it on. Make it your own, and start your own tradition!

An Introduction to Scotch

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At least around here, there tends to be one popular drink among Masons- single malt scotch. In fact, not only does our local Scottish Rite put on a scotch tasting every so often (with one next week!), but during major events like Grand Lodge, everyone brings out their bottles, and it becomes almost a traveling scotch club, with everyone trying new varieties and enjoying the fellowship that goes along with sharing a similar hobby. I will be the first to admit that I was not a fan of the stuff the first few times I tried it, but now it’s almost my exclusive drink, and with good reason.

What exactly is scotch?

Scotch, or scotch whisky, or single malt scotch,is very simply, a whisky made in Scotland in a very specific manner (actually, by specific laws!) It is almost easier to say what single malt scotch is not. It is not made in America, like Maker’s Mark, or Jack Daniels, nor is it made in Canada, like Crown Royal, it isn’t even made in Ireland, like Jameson. Perhaps the easiest way to tell where it is made is by the bottle- if it says whisky, it is made in Scotland, anywhere else is whiskey, usually even marked “Irish whiskey”, for Jameson, for example.

In addition to this, there are five categories of scotch whisky itself:

  • Single malt- a scotch made by one distillery, made only with malted barley mash, the topic of this post
  • Single grain- a scotch made by one distillery, made with a grain other than barley, like corn or rye
  • Blended scotch – a blend of one or more single malt and one or more single grain
  • Blended malt- a blend of single malts, that were all made at different distilleries
  • Blended grain- a blend of single grains, that were all made at different distilleries.

It can be a little confusing and overwhelming at first, but for the purpose of this post, we will only be discussing single malt scotch whisky, which means it was made with 100% malted barley mash, by a single distillery, in Scotland.

There’s different types of scotch?

So, when I first started drinking scotch, I was thinking about it more like vodka. Yes, some vodkas are a better quality than others, and therefore taste a bit better, but they are essentially all the same vodka.  This is not true at all with scotch. Think about scotch more like wine.  Not only do you have the option between red and white, but also merlot, cabernet, chardonnay, riesling and many more. Scotch is much more like wine, because where the distillery is located in the country, tends to dictate its flavor. So, just like you know that you may love syrahs and hate pinot noirs, the same tends to be true about scotch. If you enjoy a scotch from one location, you will probably enjoy another from a different distillery. The nice thing about scotch is that there are only 6 (traditionally 5) regions that scotches come from, instead of the numerous types of wine.

Starting at the bottom and working our way up, the regions of scotch are:

  • Lowland– These are considered the most light bodied scotches, because they are (usually) triple distilled. There are only 4 distilleries open in the lowlands currently, Ailsa Bay, Glenkinchie, Auchentoshan, and Bladnoch.
  • Cambelton- The scotch from this region is peaty (scotch talk for smokey), and tends to have a hint of salt. Cambelton was once the scotch capital, with over 30 distilleries. Now, only three remain: Glen Scotia, Glengyle, and Springbank
  • Islay- Pronounced “eye-luh”, scotches from this region tend to be the strongest and the smokiest. This is usually accredited to the high winds and seas. Distilleries in this region include  Laphroaig, Lagavulin, Bowmore, and  Ardbeg.
  • Highland- The region loved in my house the most, Highland scotches tend to have underlying tastes of peat and smoke, and are usually considered to be very full-bodied. The region is further divided, into Northern ( full and rich), Southern (light, dry and fruity), Eastern (full, dry and very fruity), and Western (full, with lots of peat and smoke). Some distilleries in this region include Oban, Glenmorangie and Dalmore
  • Speyside- Now considered the center for whisky, Speyside scotches have some of the most complex flavors, usually very sweet. The distilleries will often use water right from the river Spey, that cuts through the region. Some distilleries include Glenfiddich, The Glenlivet, and The Macallan
  • Island-Although technically considered part of the Highland region, distilleries in the Island are starting to make a name for themselves. There is no hard and fast rule, although they do tend to be fairly mild, usually somewhere in between a Highland and an Islay, with a focus on the peaty flavor. Distilleries in this region include Highland Park and Talisker

This stuff tastes like gasoline, is there a better way to drink it?

If you are lucky, you have a community of scotch drinkers in your area, probably at your lodge or shrine. If not, you may want to try going to  bar and ordering a scotch, chances are they will only have one or two for you to choose from, unless it is a specialty bar. Usually, scotch is ordered in drams, with one dram equaling to about 2 ounces. Unless you have been a rye drinker for years, I can almost guarantee that you will not care for scotch the first (few) times you give it a try. The first time I did, I thought it smelled and tasted like kerosene, and as the smell burned my nose hairs, I wondered who in their right mind would be willing to drink this stuff. I’ve been drinking scotch for about a year now, and even still, there are times when I am not in the mood to drink it down. However, much like wine, there is a preferred method of drinking a scotch.

  • I cannot say this enough, SCOTCH IS A SIPPING DRINK. Not only because it allows you to appreciated the flavor more, but because bottles of the stuff can easily break the $100 mark. It’s not something you take shots of and not something you make mixed drinks with (that’s what  whiskey tends to be for).
  • There is a special kind of glass for scotch, you can get them here, although there is nothing wrong with drinking it out of a tumbler, preferably glass.
  • While adding ice is generally considered poor form, chilled or not is really up to you. They do make special rocks called whisky stones that keep your drink cold without adding water, you can get those here.
  • Some people do add water to their scotch, since it will help cut the burn, and allows you to taste flavors that may of been masked by it. Add slowly, however, and taste your scotch before adding more.
  • As far as actually drinking it is concerned, first, you will want to nose, or smell it. Don’t stick your nose in the glass, you shouldn’t feel any burn in your nose. A swirl or two will help release more of the scent. Then, take a tiny sip, just enough to cover your tongue. In order to get the real flavor, you will want to hold it in your mouth for a bit, about 10 seconds or so. You might think that your tongue is shriveling up and dying, but after a few seconds, the burn will dissipate, and you will actually get the flavor of the scotch. Moving your tongue around, you will be able to detect different flavors. After you swallow, you will be able to detect the finish on your tongue and gums. Remember- even the most expensive scotch will burn your tongue if you just sip and swallow it, without actually tasting it.

Okay, I’m willing to try it, but how do I decide which one?

Buying scotch is again, a bit like buying wine. Scotches have different years, and distilleries will usually produce specific years, with the occasional unusual year that tends to be a special edition. The years refer to the number of years they spent in the barrel. Unlike wine, however, scotch does not age in the bottle, so a 12 year scotch will always be a 12 year scotch in the bottle, opened or not. Scotches are usually referred to by their year, followed by their distillery, for example, the 14 year Oban is a favorite at our house. Usually the younger the scotch, the cheaper the price, but they tend to carry the  harsher  burn, and the more subtle the flavors.

There tends to be two scotches that are recommended most often for the beginner scotch drinker:

The 10 year old Glenmorangie, from the Highland region. This was my first scotch as well. It tends to be fairly inexpensive as far as scotch goes, at around $35 a bottle. That may sound like a lot, but remember that one bottle will last you for weeks, perhaps longer, depending on how often you drink.The flavor is fairly fruity, mostly citrus and peach, with hints of vanilla and honeysuckle. It is beautiful in it’s complexity within it’s simplicity.

The second most recommended scotch for a beginner is the 12 year Glenlivet. It is a Speyside scotch, and while it does not have the complex flavor of the Glenmorangie,  it does have a very easy to drink taste of oak and vanilla. It is actually the most popular single malt sold in the United States. The price is comparable to the Glenmorangie, at around $30 a bottle.

Remember that the first bottle that you buy is not as important as trying new scotches and improving and expanding your palate. Each bottle will give you a better idea of flavors that you enjoy, as well as those that you do not care for.

What does all of this have to do with Masonry?

On the surface, not much. Remember, however, that a major component of Masonry is brotherhood. Similar hobbies, intrests, likes and dislikes help foster and nurture the brotherhood within a lodge or even jurisdiction. If your lodge or area has a scotch club, go to a meeting and check it out. If you do not, start one with like minded brothers. Many activities can be brought about from scotch drinking, from just trying drinks from each others collections, hosting scotch tastings, or even visiting Scotland to go on a tour of your favorite distilleries. It will help bring you and your brothers closer, which makes for a stronger lodge. Don’t forget to invite the ladies! Just because scotch is often labeled as “the gentleman’s drink” doesn’t mean women don’t like it as well. While a scotch tasting does not make for a great family activity, it does make for a nice evening out with your lady.

Freemasonry and Gender Roles

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Picture this- it’s Lodge night, your Mason isn’t due home for a few hours, the kids just got to sleep, and you finally have some time to yourself, to do what you please. Sounds relaxing, doesn’t it? Lodge nights always give me the eerie feeling of stepping back in time, when a woman stayed home with the children, and the man worked, say like, the 1950’s. There is a very good reason for this. Masonry, which became popular in the late 50’s and early 60’s, tends to reinforce the very traditional gender roles from that era.

Just what does that mean, anyway?

Gender roles are “the social and behavioral norms that are generally considered appropriate for either a man or a woman in a social or interpersonal relationship”. In other words, gender roles are the way that you act, because society tells you that you should, or it’s the agreement between you and your spouse, or it’s the way your culture says that you should act, based on your gender. For instance, the way that a woman from a very traditional Muslim family acts in public, is very different from how a man from that same family acts in public, and both act very differently  from the way that a woman from a loosely Christian household might act  in public. They aren’t right or wrong, they just vary from person to person for any number of reasons.

What does this have to do with Freemasonry?

The scenario above depicts very traditional Western gender roles that is, the husband goes to work, while the wife stays home and takes care of the 2.5 kids. Add a white picket fence, and its practically the American dream. Freemasonry gives us many things. It gives us tradition, ritual, a sense of self, a way to give back to the community, amongst other things. If you notice, however, one of the things it does not  give us is change. Freemasonry is very rooted in it’s ways, and tends to be very “this is the way it is, because this is the way that it always has been”.

No one can seem to agree on exactly when modern Freemasonry began, but it is agreed that it was around the turn of the 20th century. Let’s think about life in the early 1900’s. Radio and cinema were still in their infancies, many people still had servants, and save for a small group of women, the ladies of the house chose to stay home while the men worked.  When creating something as complex as Freemasonry, you will, of course, want to be able to integrate it into your life, as well as future member’s lives as easily as possible. Since women staying home was the norm at the time, perhaps this was a factor in the exclusion of women from Freemasonry during its creation. Staying home was expected of women at the time, it was the typical gender role, and Freemasonry simply stayed the course of society at the time.

These gender roles stayed true throughout the years, including during the 1960’s, when Freemasonry had its first big boom. Women were beginning to enter the work force more regularly, but in very submissive roles, such as secretary, and many women continued to stay home while the man of the house worked. Again, Freemasonry was easily integrated here, because it supported the gender roles that the society, for the most part, continued to dictate. In addition to a rise of Freemasonry membership, Order of the Eastern star and other women’s auxiliary groups saw an influx of members. Perhaps some of this can be attributed to the fact that women were becoming more independent, and more likely to work out of the home and do their own thing. The continued separation, however, continued to support the way that things always had been.

Many have said that we are currently in another membership boom for Freemasonry, and I am inclined to agree with that. What is different now, is that gender roles have changed, which causes some tension on the topic of women and Freemasonry. Women no longer stay at home and care for the home and children as the norm, in fact, this tends to be abnormal. Families now aren’t known to just be a man, a woman, and some kids, but instead made up of numerous combinations. Yet, Freemasonry supports the same gender roles. the same societal roles as it did during its inception the Mason goes to lodge, and the non-Mason, being excluded, does their own thing.  I feel that this is a growing issue in Freemasonry, and will continue to be an issue until more lodges choose to do something about it. Many have, doing things such as inviting the women to lodge dinner, having free wi-fi and cable in a lodge lounge, and generally trying to make lodge night as welcoming as possible to all members of a Mason’s family, not just the Mason himself.

So, this is a bad thing right?

Yes and no. Yes, I think that propagating traditional gender roles, whether consciously or not, is harmful to Freemasonry, and will turn off a lot of potential younger members. I also believe that all organizations should be somewhat flexible in “getting with the times”. I am not calling for a radical reformation of the way that Freemasonry works, I just think that small things could be done to make it a bit more welcoming for the rest of the family. This is most easily done on a lodge by lodge basis.

That being said, I think that viewed in the correct light, the traditional gender roles that Freemasonry promotes can be a very good thing. Go back to the scenario at the beginning of the article. Now, imagine that you are a woman in the 1920’s. Your husband leaving for lodge on a regular basis give you two things you might not usually get at that time independence, and autonomy. In fact, organizations that excluded women around this time, helped women actually join the workforce, and eventually join (some) of those organizations. In part, being excluded and away from your husband when all the chores were done and the kids were asleep, forced women into a kind of sink or swim scenario, either they had to gain the confidence to be seen as a separate person, or they could hide back in the shadows. The former is what a lot of women chose, shown by the boom of the women’s auxiliary and independent groups.

Speaking more modernly, I feel that the exclusion for one partner in a relationship can also be healthy for that relationship. If you know that your partner is going to be gone for 4 hours every Wednesday, you can plan things that they might not want to do with you, or things that you only want to do for yourself. When T is at lodge, for instance, I will often go to the gym, then come home and cook myself a nice meal, not having to worry about having to share, and then watch a horror movie, or play some video games. I think that the regularly scheduled time apart helps get rid of the “omg I want to strangle you right now” feeling that we all get in relationships sometimes.

These are just my thoughts and observations, as with anything on the internet, please take it with a grain of salt. That being said, I would love to hear what anyone has to say about the topic. I do not mind at all if you do not agree with me, I just ask that you remain respectful!

Order of the Eastern Star: A Primer

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This week is a little crazy- my birthday is tomorrow, and I have two exams, as well as working during the week, so I apologize if you have seen this before (you will if you followed me here from Reddit), but my free time is a little short this week. We will be returning to your regularly scheduled programming next week, with an article on the first known woman to become a regular mason. (Yes, you read that right!) One last bit before I get started, in case you don’t read this- I started a twitter account for this blog, check it out at @themasonslady , and say hi!

What is the Order of the Eastern Star?

The Order of the Eastern Star (or Eastern Star, or OES), is the world’s largest fraternal organization that can be joined by both men and women. It is a member of the Masonic family, but joining does not make a member a mason. It’s more of an axillary group, that supports masonic lodges, masonic youth organizations, as well as their own agenda. Like all Masonic organizations, they support membership when in need, both financially and emotionally. They also provide a framework for introspective thought and philosophical discussion on ethical and spiritual topics.

Who can join OES?

In order to be eligible to receive the degrees of Eastern Star, a woman must be a: wife, daughter, adopted daughter, mother, widow, sister, half sister, granddaughter, stepmother, stepdaughter, stepsister, daughter-in-law,grandmother, great granddaughter, niece, great niece, mother-in-law, sister-in-law, or aunt of a Master Mason in good standing. (Basically, if you can prove you are in some way or another related to a Mason who is paid up, you’re in.) Former members of Job’s Daughters and Rainbow Girls are also eligible to join. Men wishing to join the order must be Master Masons. All members must be at least eighteen.

How do I join OES?

Step 1) Find a chapter in your area.

Step 2) Ask for a petition, fill it out, return it.

Step 3) Interview with members of your prospective chapter.

Step 4) ????

Step 5) Profit.

But, what do they *do*?

I can’t answer for other chapters, only for what goes on in Nebraska. In Nebraska, OES is the majority supporter for the Masonic youth organizations- Job’s Daughters, Rainbow Girls, and Demolay. They also operate the Masonic-Eastern Star Home for Children – a place for kids who are either wards of the state or are having other troubles. They also provide scholarships to college students and support other minor charitable efforts in their respective local areas.

What about the degrees? Is there memory work?

There are five  degrees, received in one night. There is no memory work required for initiation. There is, however, memory work involved if you would like to be an officer.

Why did you chose to join?

Eastern Star was very important to my great-grandparents; I never got to meet any of them, so this is a way for me to connect with my family’s past. I can now say I have walked the same path my great-grandmother did, almost 100 years ago. I also think that it is a great way to connect with T, as a lot of the rituals are similar to what they do in lodge. I cannot, of course, share any of the secret work with him, just has he cannot share his with me; I think its kind of nice to have my own masonic secrets.

Does there have to be a guy involved?

It’s not the way that I would have it set up, but yes. MMs are involved in a number of different ways. There’s two male only officer positions that they can hold- Worthy Patron and Associate Worthy Patron. My chapter current has a MM also sitting the position of Chaplin, Sentinel (Tyler), and I was lucky enough to have a MM who is a good friend of mine as Host (I’m not sure if blue lodge does this- he sat with me before I was called in, and after my initiation, to help me with the rest of the meeting, introduced me to people, etc). I’m not sure about the rest of the positions, I know that the points and matron positions must be held by women (obviously), but I don’t see why a MM couldn’t be say, treasurer, or secretary. Otherwise, MMs are full, voting members, but it does tend to be a bit of a role reversal, the MMs are there to support the sisters, the girls run the show here.

I was orginally upset about this fact, that a man must be there in order for a chapter of OES to be open. Now that I am a member of Eastern Star, I realize, I was looking at it all wrong from the beginning. In the Blue Lodge, the MM does his work, with support from his wife. In Eastern Star, the opposite is true, the Sister does her work with the support of her husband. MMs are present in the Star, but it is a support role, the women are truly the ones in charge here. Much of my offense was simply ignorance, but I believe it to be one of those things you cannot really get over until you are already in.

If you still disagree with this, there are women’s only orders within the masonic family.

Everyone asks me “Why would anyone want to join OES?”

There is kind of a huge stigma involving OES within the masonic family. When I told our masonic friends I was joining, everyone had something to complain about it, mostly about how boring it was, and how much marching there was. I ignored them, I wanted to find out for myself. Yes, it is true that watching grass grow would be more exciting than listening to a chapter open. However, I think that there is a lot of wiggle room for change, and that your chapter is what you make of it. I would love to change people’s thoughts about OES, and make it something more attractive, something at people will want to join. If you are reading this right now, chances are you are in the “next generation” of masonry. We are the ones that will bring about the positive change to this organization. I also believe that if we do not, it will be gone in the next 20 years.

I’m going to cut it a bit short and leave it there for now. I am planning on returning to the general topic of Eastern Star at a later point, but if you have any questions let me know, and don’t forget to check us out on twitter @themasonslady!

Women and Freemasonry: An Introduction

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Ah, a topic close to my heart, women and masonry. Get comfy, this one might be a long one.

So, women can’t be masons, right?

Yes and no.

Lets start with the latter. No, women cannot join the (Ancient Free) and Accepted Masons, aka Blue Lodge, aka lodge, aka, the stepping stone of Scottish Rite, Shriners, and at least 30 other appendant bodies. Yes, I know. Let me share my perspective on the matter.

When I first met my boyfriend, and found out that he was a mason, my first reaction was to be jealous that I could not join, and be offended at the blatant sexism that was happening in an organization that he is so involved in. I snooped around, trying to find some loophole or backdoor that would let me into the secret boys club. You see, I am  a geek, and I tend to be the token female in many of my geek circles. Being shut out from the boys and having to “earn” my way into the level of acceptance that they hold each other to has been going on for years in my life. So, I was used to this, in a way, but not used to being 100% shut out, with absolutely no way in.

As my relationship grew, so did my level of involvement in the lodge. I began cooking meals for degree nights, helping the other women in the kitchen, cleaning up after family meals, going to the Shrine bar after lodge to drink with the boys, going on DeMolay outings, and more. My boyfriend recognized the level of interest I hold, and suggested I look into joining the Order of the Eastern Star.In a way, this was like finding out that I could not become a mason all over again. Women and men can join OES, and they are preceded over by a Worthy Matron and Patron. I again, found it rather sexist, but I was too interested to not look into it.

During all of this time, I was discussing all of these feelings with T. He is terribly understanding about it all, but we kind of came to a mutual conclusion. It is healthy for partners in a relationship to have time apart, and masonry became very popular when far less women were independent in their own right. So while I may find some of the traditions to be sexist, it is still just that, tradition, something old. Perhaps our grandparents were onto something?

As for the yes- yes, women can join masonry. There are lodges that are referred to as irregular, clandestine, or co-masonic. Women can join these lodges, and can become a Perfect Masoness (the lodge’s equivalent of a MM). I cannot claim to know much about co-masonry. I do know, however, that it was originated in France, under the name Le Droit Humain, The International Order of Mixed Freemasonry. It has lodges in over 60 countries, and is continues to be fairly popular in Europe, especially France and Belgium. Today there are a number of organizations that run co-masonic lodges, including Le Droit Humain, The Eastern Order of International Co-Freemasonry, and The Co-Freemasonic Order of the Blazing Star. It can be very confusing trying to find locations of co-masonic lodges due to all of the different groups that run them. There are a number in England, and of course France, Belgium, and the rest of Europe. Those in the United States, however, tend to be in larger coastal cities. If you would like more information, this website has all of the links for every co-masonic, or women’s only lodges.

Before you run off to join a co-masonic lodge, I suggest that you stop and think about this. If your boyfriend, your husband, your SO, or even just a friend is a mason, a member of a blue lodge chartered by a regular Grand Lodge in your state or country, he is not allowed to discuss secret masonic work with you, even if you become a master mason (or equivalent). This is because regular, or mainstream lodges do not recognize lodges that accept women as members, solely because of that reason. This is not to say that you can no longer discuss masonry with him. Quite the contrary really, as many regular (“masculine”? saying regular just seems weird) lodges will invite co-masonic lodges for discussion, and there can be fellowship between the two lodges. However, if you are a member of a co-masonic lodge, and your SO is a member of a masculine (I think I like that better) lodge, you cannot attend regular meetings at his lodge. I am not sure if he is able to attend yours.

If you are thinking about joining a co-masonic lodge, do your homework!!! There are a number of “scam” lodges that exist, only there to take your money and give you a shiny title in exchange. If you are a member of a co-masonic lodge, please contact me! I would love to chat with someone that is an active member and get their perspective.

There are some unspoken hostilities between masculine and co-masonic lodges, some for good reasons, and some…  The best thing I could find on the topic came from the United Grand Lodge of England (commonly referred to as UGLE),

Brethren are therefore free to explain to non-Masons, if asked, that Freemasonry is not confined to men (even though this Grand Lodge does not itself admit women)

 So, what can I join?

There are a number of organizations that you can join that will get you more involved with masonry, that are associated with masculine lodges. Unless noted, you must be 18, and related to a MM. When they say related, it basically means, if you want to join, you will find the relation. I joined OES due to my great-grandfather whom I never met.

  • OES, or Order of the Eastern Star, probably the most widespread organization. I will be doing a more in depth post on this organization later, but I will tell you right off the bat, that it is open to women related to Master Masons, as well as Master Masons themselves. It tends to have a very negative reputation, but as a member myself, I enjoy it a good bit. You can also join if you were a Rainbow Girl, or in Job’s Daughters.
  • Order of the Amarath– Similar to OES, in fact, it used to be that you had to join OES before you could become a member of OA. Again, this is open to women related to MM and MM themselves.
  • Ladies’ Oriental Shrine of North America– Far less prevalent, these are the “lady Shriners”. Only women can join this organization. You must, however, be related to a MM or a Shriner.
  • The Order of the White Shrine of Jerusalem– One of the requirements to join this organization is to profess a belief in Jesus Christ. Again, this is open to women only.
  • Heroines of Jericho– This and the next one are a bit different. These groups are related to Prince Hall masonry, which may or may not be recognized as regular lodges in your state or country. This organization is associated with Prince Hall Royal Arch
  • Order of Cyrenes– Similar to the Heroines, however this organization is associated with Prince Hall Templars.
  • Daughters of the Nile– This group is associated with Shriners, but is different from LOSNA in that their focus is fundraising, whereas LOSNA is more focused on sociability. Again, you must be related to a MM, Shriner, or a Daughter of the Nile.
  • Scottish Rite Ladies- This is not a national or international chapter, but instead depends on your Grand Lodge, or even the Scottish Rite chapter in your area. It tends to be more women getting together and having a good time, that is usually organized by the men (at least here in Nebraska). Must be related to a MM that is a member of Scottish Rite.
  • Order of the Weavers– This is where I get kind of jealous. The Dutch don’t really have any co-masonic lodges, so the ladies decided to make their own body that is associated with masculine lodges. How cool is that! If you have anymore information on this organization, please contact me!
  • The Widow’s Sons Ladies – Mentioned by a member of Reddit, this unique group is associated with the Masonic motorcycle group, the Widow’s Sons.

What else can I do?

Don’t be afraid to offer to help out around the lodge if you are interested in being more involved! If you’re not into it, no big deal; I know your mason would appreciate your interest. It seems that there are dinners, dances, fundraisers, you name it, almost every night of the week here- we’re not a big city, but there’s 12 masonic lodges, plus a shrine and Scottish rite, star…you get the idea. Even if you live in a small town with only one lodge, there’s bound to be something to do at least once a month.

Offer to help cook or clean, or even just hang out with the ladies at your lodge while the meeting is occurring- that’s right, it’s your lodge too, make yourself feel comfortable there! Weekly (biweekly, monthly), meetings are a great place to meet new people with a common interest-it’s really all about socializing after all. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, they will be answered if possible. Ask to see the lodge room, often there will be antique pieces that the lodge owns (I always find that stuff fascinating), ask about symbols you see, ask lots of questions!

What if….?

One last bit of advice. If you are not comfortable with masonry, for any reason, whether your mason is a candidate or a 33rd degree mason, let them know. You might find that your worries were just because you did not know enough, or it might be for another reason. I cannot stress this enough. Masonry can take up a good chunk of one’s social life, and if you are uncomfortable with the amount of time that your mason is spending at lodge, tell him.

I cut this topic a bit short, because there is so much that can be said about women and masonry. I will be covering the history of women and masonry at one point.

Have a wonderful week!